Managing the neighbours

The boyfriend has risen.

Actually, he awoke from his deep slumber a couple of days ago, and has lent a supportive ear on several occasions since as I wage battle with my noisy neighbours.

I enjoy talking to boyfriend Maiyuu when I have problems, and when he is in a mood to listen.

The other day, after he woke from four days of sleep, interrupted only briefly for meals, Maiyuu declared he was feeling better but for a sore back.

He came home from work the week before with a chest cold, so took himself to bed to sleep it off. When he woke, the chest cold was gone, but he found himself with a sore back, which he attributed to the poor condition of the fold-back sofa which he uses as a bed.

I told him to go to the shopping mall to look for a new one, and for once he took my advice. As I headed to Mum's shop that evening, he sent me a text message asking me to transfer B8000, the cost of a new bed.

I found a cash machine and sent him the money. The bed will arrive in a week.

The couple with the noisy air conditioning unit turned it on again last night. The air con unit is attached to a wall we share. When they turn it on, my bedroom starts to hum.

We rent two rooms. Maiyuu sleeps in the other one, which is separated from mine by a curtain.

Maiyuu and I moved the mattress of my bed into the room where Maiyuu normally sleeps, and placed it on the floor. It is further away from the air con unit, but even from there we could both here the thing grinding away.

I did not sleep until 6am, when they finally turned the thing off - after a little encouragement from my end, when I started beating on the wall with my fist.

Last night, I spent an hour talking to Maiyuu about where else we could live in Bangkok, why we live where we do, and why our neighbours insist on turning on the air even though they know that next door they are keeping people from their sleep.

'They probably turned on the TV and just fell asleep with the TV and air going. Thais are like that,' Maiyuu said.

His remarks giving me insights into the way Thais think and act help ease my tension, because they help me understand behaviour which I would otherwise find baffling and frustrating. They were not trying to wind us up; they just fell asleep with the air on.

We live where we do because it is convenient. I live in a market, where we can buy a wide variety of cooked and fresh food, at any hour of the day. It is also at the head of a convenient bus route, and within walking distance of a shopping mall. Many condos in Bangkok may look grand, but are a long way from anywhere. It is hard to find places to eat, and the nearest mall is a bus ride away.

The other day, before work, I ordered a fried rice dish from a shop right opposite the bus stop, which is just metres from my home. A bus had just pulled up and was killing time. I signalled to the driver that I wanted to get on his bus, while I approached the shop.

The owner saw me, and ran towards me with my order, in a little white box. I took it from her, thanked her, and climbed on the bus. The driver and the ticket-seller, who had waited for me, asked me what I ordered.

'Fried rice?'

'Yes.'

Thanks to the neighbours, I managed to get just four hours of sleep. In the early afternoon, I went down to see the office, for yet another talk about the neighbours and their air con.

The office manager called the air conditioning company. She put him on loud speaker, so I could hear what he said. 'That's so you know he's not ripping off the farang,' she said helpfully.

He said the cost of moving the air con unit from my neighbours' wall where it is affixed now, to a bracket overhanging their balcony would come to B2000.

I have offered to pay half, though I could end up paying the whole amount, as my neighbours will have to suffer the inconvenience of having an air con man working in their place. They have, however, agreed to get the work done, which is good news - though when the office talked to them today, they complained that I had thumped on the wall with my fist.

'They said that no matter how much you beat on the wall, they won't turn the air off,' she said.

The air con man will turn up at 2pm on Monday, when my neighbours assure the office that they shall be at home. If all goes according to plan, we should be able to return to sleepless nights next week.

Maiyuu has helped with none of it, as I was the one who complained about the noise. In one way, I am happy he has stayed clear of the affair, to avoid confusing the office staff, who have had to listen to my complaints, at the same time as negotiate with my neighbours and the air con company.

In this non-confrontational culture, I am not expected to talk to the neighbours myself (especially as I do not know them). Instead, I complain to the office, and they pass the message on. If they are upset by my behaviour, they do the same. We need never meet or talk to each other. If I see them on my floor, I pass them in silence.

Still, there is a limit to my patience in playing this game. Noisy neighbours have to know that I can make their life miserable, just as they upset me. 'Open and close the door on the balcony a lot, and they will notice,' says Maiyuu. 'But thumping the wall is too provocative.'

I wonder how noisy our neighbours would have to become before my boyfriend did anything himself - or whether, as a non-confrontational Thai, he would just let them carry on with it.

Still, at least he has been here, offering advice and listening to my complaints. I would hate to do it all alone.