Daddy elephant and the naked ascetic

An elephant walking through Bangkok

A young man escorting a large elephant through town asked me if I would like to buy bananas for him (the elephant) to eat.

'Dad (Ah Pa)...elephant? ' he asked.

This is the first time I have been called Dad.

Many Thais have called me uncle, but an uncle can start his duties at any age.

In real life (outside the blogosphere), I am now an uncle many times over, though I seldom see my nieces and nephews.

I was a little shocked, and shook my head to say no.

Boyfriend Maiyuu says the term does not have to mean Dad. Traders can use it as a term of endearment to refer to customers generally. Still, when I heard it, I felt old.

Before I was Uncle (Lung). Now I am Dad.

Still, it's better than being called Aunty - which, but for the tone, sounds very similar to the word 'Pa' meaning Dad.

-

'Mum's place is dead...where else shall we drink?' I asked my work friend, farang C.

He and I have drunk at Mum's shop half a dozen times. I introduced him to the place one night, to show him that life outside the tourist zone in Silom, where he lives, can be just as rich and colourful.

In Silom, he does battle with mamasans, drunken foreign friends, and bargirls who steal money.

On the Thon Buri side where I live and drink, he can take in the family side of Thai life - Mum and Dad arguing with kids, street dogs, drunken Thais...

I prefer mixing with Thais rather than foreigners, so no surprise if I should have stuck by Mum's place all these years.

But the place is now barely a shop at all. When I see it, I think of Charlie Brown's lemonade stall. Why would you bother, unless you felt sorry for the kids, or were absolutely parched?

'Let's try Klong Toey,' said farang C.

Klong Toey, which is closer to where he lives, contains an odd mix of the super-wealthy and ultra-poor. It is home to mansions and slums alike, separated only by a motorway.

As it happens, I know two places where we can drink on nearby Pra Ram 4, which span both sides of the wealth divide.

One is indoors, and looks like a boutique eatery, similar to the smart joints he frequents in Silom, or in trendy Thong Lor.

It has plenty of golden woodwork, and subdued yellow lighting, but is probably empty most of the time. Few tourists dine in Klong Toey, and most young Thais who want to be seen stick to the central city.

The other is just around the corner - an outdoors khao tom shop which also serves booze.

I haven't been to either in years. Tonight, I shall catch a bus into Klong Toey to meet farang C.

I will take him to these two little shops I know, and ask him how he would like to drink - like a farang tourist, indoors at some wannabe Thong Lor establishment - or at a humble khao tom shop, staffed by youngsters from Esan, who are tired, overworked, and thinking of home.

Which way will he choose?

-

Chee Plueay Jao Leh (ชีเปลือยเจ้าเล่ห์) is a short story in Thai for children about the dangers of entrusting secrets. A merchant is washed ashore after his ship sinks at sea. He has no clothes, and locals assume he is an ascetic. They shower him with gifts and ask for his advice.

The King of the Garudas and King of the Serpents are among his followers. Because he is a nosy, fickle type, he extracts a secret from one, and passes it to the other, in the hope of getting some benefit.

Disclosure of the secret has potentially disastrous results, for the two are lethal foes.

However, when the two kings realise they have been deceived by the naked ascetic, they reconcile, and get their revenge.

Sound interesting? A Thai woman has translated one version of this ancient story into English, and asked me to check her work.

She wants to publish this story and about 50 others related to Buddha's birth in a book for young children.

A mutual friend has asked me to help her. 'My friend wants to make merit...please check her English,' he asked.

I doubt there is a market for such books. At that age, few Thais are interested in English. I am about to finish her story on the naked ascetic. Hopefully, she will then lose interest, or find some more productive way to occupy her time.

Am I being mean?