Stick to the gay track

Boyfriend Maiyuu has solved his pastry problem.

He is making puff pastry. The book of recipes he is using, which he bought the other day at the shopping mall, urged him to roll the stuff into sheets using a rolling pin, but it didn't work.

Earlier, he had mixed in flour with salted butter chopped into small squares, also without success. The problem, as I understand it, is that the butter would not blend in with the flour.

Last night, after three failed attempts and much cursing, he decided to knead it with his hands, which achieved much better results. The butter blended in with the flour. This morning he will bake it in the oven.

He attributes the problem to a misprint in the recipe.

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New Year is a mad time. Strange things happen to people's habits, and moods.

Yesterday I asked Maiyuu for a share of the money I earn from the extra work I am doing at the office. I am earning an extra B12,000 a month. I don't know how long that it will last, but it is good to have.

The other day, I asked him for B1000 a month from the total. He said I would have to wait until next month, as in his view I had already spent enough this month.

Unhappy with that answer, last night I proposed upping that to B3000, which after all is only one quarter. My suggestion set off a blizzard of nasty text messages.

Maiyuu was absent, having the spent the night before, all yesterday, away from home. He refused to answer my calls, which left only SMS exchanges.

'Why don't I just give you back the ATM card? Or would you like me to move out, too? That way you could spend all the money on boys, and have the place to yourself as well.'

That was the nastiest of his messages. When I arrived home from work, Maiyuu was sitting on the floor, belting a large mound of dough with a rolling pin. He probably imagines it was me.

He was still in a sulky mood. 'I am not supporting anyone...I just don't want to go back to running short before pay day every two weeks, as I was before,' I said.

'You have already told me that you want to keep the Google cheque from your blog advertising. Just how much do you need?' he asked.

Previously, I gave Maiyuu money from that source whenever he asked for it, to supplement the money I earn from work, most of which Maiyuu spends on our needs himself, as he keeps my ATM card.

He transfers to me a share of my salary every pay day, but it does not last.

For the next couple of months, I will need to save my Google Adsense money, as I am going overseas. Maiyuu has declined to give me the money from my salary, so I have no choice.

'If B3000 is too much, I will settle for B2000,' I said.

I do not mind if Maiyuu keeps my ATM card, or has control over how most of our money is spent. But I will not force myself to scrape and scrimp in misery when we have no need to do so.

Maiyuu reckons he spends my money more wisely. He has a point there, even if he rarely tells me how he spends it, or what we have left in the account.

I do not throw money at gay guys, as I don't go to nightclubs. I do give small amounts of money to some of the kids who live in the market, because they have little.

That's forgivable, and Maiyuu knows I help them.

Occasionally, I am tempted to support people in more substantial ways, which I suspect is less sensible.

I know a young man in the market whose mother works long hours selling goods away from home, but who has no home phone to call her.

He is close to his mother, and misses her when she is at work. He has an elder brother, but he is often away. Their father is dead.

My young friend owned a second-hand cellphone, but it broke.

I asked him how much a second-hand replacement phone would cost. 'A bit more than 1000 baht,' he said.

In a silly moment the other day, I thought how good it would be to buy him another second-hand phone, or at least give the money to his mother. She could buy it for him, without saying that I helped her.

But then I thought: 'Why him?'

He has an elder brother, who might get jealous, or insist he keep the phone to himself.

My young friend does not like being seen in public with me, as I am older foreign male. His brother or friends could tease him for being gay.

I know other deserving cases around here. I look for people on whom to shower love, because my boyfriend is so unresponsive to me, or seems distracted with other things.

A few possible solutions:

1. Bury myself in work or reading books, and try to forget about my emotional needs.

2. Mix more with gays, and less with straight youngsters who are good at asking me for money. On that note, start visiting gay nightspots, though ideally I would go with a friend rather than alone, which looks sad and desperate.

3. Forget about mixing with families in the market. I am the only westerner living in these parts, and tend to stand out.

Postscript: Thanks to Neil for the advice about pastry which cracks. I shall pass it on.