Facing up to the men in khaki

The waiting is almost over. Within hours, we will know whether Ball has to serve as a conscripted soldier.

Forced military service, which in his case could last up to two years, could change my young man’s life, and probably for the better.

However, I cannot help wanting him to stay close to us instead.

Men who enter their 21st year are eligible for the conscription draw, decided at district offices and schools around the country (the pictures here come from previous military conscription rounds).

He will report to his local district office to be weighed, measured, and take part in the conscription lottery.

If he pulls a red paper, he must serve. If he pulls a black paper, he can breathe a sigh of relief, and go back to leading a normal life.

Service for conscripts starts with a three-month training exercise which will keep him away from home for all that time.

Conscripts enter service in May or November. They must sever themselves from their daily lives as civilians, including quitting whatever jobs they are working.

‘At least I will be here for the birth of my daughter, who is due in a matter of weeks. If I could not see her before I leave, I would feel terrible,’ said a stoic Ball, when talking about the prospect of military service.

Thais who finished school with an inferior leaving qualification – Year 3 of secondary school, in Ball's case - can expect to serve up to two years, compared to just one year someone with a university qualification (discounted to six months if he volunteers).

‘Mum said that if I am chosen, I should try to be strong. My elder brother was a conscript before me, and she gave him the same advice. She said that on the day I leave, I should walk out the door and not look back,’ he said.

The fact that Ball and girlfriend Jay are expecting their first child does not excuse him from military duty, should he be unlucky in the conscription draw.

Jay will have to wait for his return, along with everyone else. Ball’s family will care for her and the baby in the meantime. While he can’t return home for at least the first three months, we can make family visits to the military camp where he serves out his training...be it in Bangkok, or in the provinces.

Ball's mother asked me last week if I would help her pay a bribe to the military people to have his name taken off the list for this year's conscription lottery and put on the list for next year's draw instead, so he could spend the first 12 months at home with his young child.

However, she must have spoken to the military recruiters again since then, for she has now told Ball that no bribes can help, and he has no choice but to present himself for the draw.

'We left it too late,' he said.

On the plus side, when he visited the military recruitment centre recently to pick up a conscription form, he found the place packed with young men signing up as volunteers.

If the military enlists plenty of volunteers, it won't need as many conscripts to fill out the numbers (conscripts top up the total number needed by the forces in any one year, broken down by districts).

Young men in poor districts like signing up, because the military offers job security.

On the negative side, the military is recruiting more people than in the past.

The armed forces and Defence Ministry want to conscript 97,280 men this year - an increase of 9,828 from last year.

Almost everyone has heard stories of families bucking the draw by paying bribes, or citing an obscure medical complaint to give their sons an exemption on health grounds.

A committee oversees conscription in each district, to make sure the process is held fairly.

Ball, while scared initially, says he is now prepared for his fate, whatever it may be.

‘I am not scared about serving. If I pull a red card, I will have to serve, and that’s it,’ he said.

Fleeing his responsibilities would not work, as the military comes after conscripts who refuse to serve. He would not be able to use his ID card if he bucked the draft, which means he would not be able to work, either.

Until last week, Ball was working at a local coffee shop, where he served customers and helped in the kitchen.

The shop is a tiny place attached to a petrol station, but the owner has big ideas. ‘She told us the customers were hi-so, and we would have to watch our behaviour,’ he said.

Ball lost his job, after he made the mistake of turning up with his girlfriend.

‘I started work one day at 5am. Jay took me on the motorbike. I asked her to sit in the shop until the sun rose, so she could go home safely. I didn’t want her driving home in the dark,’ he said.

However, the owner resented her presence, as Ball thought he had invited Jay into the shop to be nosy.

‘She pulled me to one side and told me the job was not really for me. She said I would probably have to serve – the owner and her boyfriend had laid odds on my chances – and I should prepare myself for military duty instead,’ he said.

‘She worked us hard, but was constantly criticising her staff rather than giving encouragement. I had decided I would have to leave anyway,’ he said.

While Ball can laugh about his ill-fated coffee shop adventure now, he was upset at the time, and I do not blame him.

Ball and I were sharing a couple of beers, with a heavily impregnated Jay perched on the couch next to us.

Our young man told us what was likely to happen if he was called to serve.

I admired his courage. He spoke matter-of-factly, and laughed as he tried to make the best of whatever fate was about to throw him.

He wants to spare my feelings, and those of his girlfriend.

I wept, Jay followed my lead.

‘I can’t get used to this idea,’ I said, rubbing my eyes.

Ball patted my knee.

‘Save your crying for conscription day...don’t rush into assuming I will have to serve!’ he laughed.

Aware that he will soon be a father, Ball has made concerted efforts to find work, attending a handful of interviews, including some on the other side of town in an often-futile quest to find a job which will keep him happy.

He has curbed his drinking, and vows to carry on looking for work if he is lucky enough to escape the draft.

'Mum has asked my elder brother and I to enter the monkhood if I escape the lottery,' he said.

His determination to improve himself is showing results: his girlfriend beams when I see her these days, and chats away happily. She is no longer the sulky, unhappy teen of old who despairs of her future with a young man who drinks and refuses to work.

She teases him mercilessly, making good use of her sharp tongue. Ball doesn’t mind being held up for a gentle ribbing, and in fact enjoys the attention.

‘Why don’t you take pills and grow a temporary set of breasts...you’re face is so soft, you could pass as a girl and gain an exemption from service,’ she said.

Ball smiled. ‘I would rather pull a red than go as a woman,’ he said.

Conscription has its pluses.

It would remove Ball from the poisonous environment of the slum, where the tempting sight of people drinking surrounds him constantly.

The discipline of the military would also toughen him up. When Ball encounters difficulty at work, he bolts for the shelter of home.

If he comes across someone he dislikes, he cannot run for cover, but must face the problem head on, as he will be confined to the based at a military camp. There is no escape.

The young man who leaves us in a matter of weeks, should he be chosen to serve, will not be the same man who returns in many months from now.

I can only hope the military cares for him, that someone there will take an interest in his welfare and help him get through the experience in one piece.

Ball plans to arrive at the conscription office at the ghastly hour of 5am. I doubt that reporting so early will hasten the draw, or improve his chances, but he wants to put an end to the uncertainty.

Jay and I will follow a few hours later, to lend moral support as he submits himself to the draw.

Conscription day is tomorrow. Wish us luck.