The I-Phone purchase: You monstrous, beautiful thing

So Maiyuu has bought his I-Phone. I have to agree with my boyfriend - they are the most beautiful things.

As I write, he has his head down poking away at the buttons. I also agree with Anonymous (whoever he is) that I-Phones are fun, and that everyone needs a toy. What I don't like is that he has gone into hire purchase debt to buy it.

I looked up True's website, where details of the I-Phone offer are posted. It does not allow early repayment, so Maiyuu is stuck with that (admittedly small) debt for the next two years. Good luck!

I asked him how he intends to find the money each month to pay it. 'I will spend less money on food, especially baking for us at home.'

He will also ask a friend about the possibility of supplying baking to a shop she owns. 'I could make two or three bakery items for sale in her shop every day,' he says.

Maiyuu has a gay friend called Joe, who lives in our old condo in Thon Buri. Yesterday he went to see Joe, to proudly show him his new phone purchase.

Joe's boyfriend has a sister who runs a coffee shop in town. Maiyuu says he will talk to her about supplying her with baking.

I can't see it happening myelf, as Maiyuu lacks motivation. At this stage, it's just talk. However, for his own good, and mine, he should indeed find some work to do.

I would take it as a sign of good faith that he is still prepared to act responsibly, and is not wilfully abandoning the financial good sense I have drummed into his head over the last nine years.

One small bauble of advice I gave him many years ago was: 'Don't get into debt!'

We do not own credit cards. In fact, I won't allow it.

Thailand is a cash (and hire-purchase) -based economy. Consumers do not rack up purchases on credit cards as a matter of course, if for no other reason that the cards cannot be used as easily here as they are in the West.

When we met, Maiyuu was so ignorant about finances that he did not know how interest rates worked.

These days, he's better. 'True is not charging me interest rates for the I-Phone, as we are subscribers to their television service,' he says.

'I have thought about this purchase carefully for months.'

Encouraging?

'I know we can cut expenses, and find money not just to pay for the I-Phone but also save at least B1,000 extra every month, for those times when we need it, and for things you want, such as Lasik treatment on your eyes.'

 
How sweet. I will believe it when I see it. Maiyuu wants to start the new savings regime next month.

He asked True to set the repayment date on his phone for the first half of the month.

That's also when we pay the rent.

Maiyuu wants me to contact the landlord to ask if we can defer the day we pay rent until the second half of the month, rather than the first.

I get paid twice a month. 'Ask if you can defer rent day for four days. By then your pay for the second half of the month will have come out, and the bill will be easier to pay,' he says.

I haven't asked the owner for permission to defer rent day yet, but already Maiyuu has bought the phone.

Thais just can't wait. Everything has to be 'now'.

Maiyuu says a large queue of Thais was waiting to sign up for the hire purchase plan when he visited the True outlet yesterday.

No doubt these are many of the same Thais who visit the pawn-broker's shop every month when money runs out for basic groceries.

At least two of Maiyuu's friends from our old condo, including Joe, visit pawnshops. I know, because Maiyuu used to keep the pawn tickets on their behalf. Yet I bet if I asked to look at their cellphones, they would own smarter, more modern models than mine.

My phone is ancient, it is true. But then I don't care for technology, nor see the appeal in parading the latest gadgets before my friends. Who cares?

Maiyuu now has a new phone number to go with the I-Phone.

He will give me his old phone - which is also more modern than mine - now that he no longer has any need for it.

When Maiyuu walked in after visiting the True shop yesterday, I immediately asked whether he had bought the thing.

Earlier, as he left home, I sent him several SMS messages, urging him to think again.

I must have looked worried. 'Yes,I bought it...are you alright?' Maiyuu asked.

'Don't get stressed. I have thought this through carefully, and it won't cause any problems.'

I sat on Maiyuu's bed as he told me excitedly about his new purchase. He looked lovely, and for a brief moment I put aside my worries and decided that his worries are my own, just as any partner should.

Later, I reminded myself that such thinking is nonsense, because I can never hope to get through to this young man.

Today, it's an I-Phone. Next time he sees something else which he just must have, we'll go through this drama again.

Once, I would have found the prospect of more emotional turmoil depressing. Now, I realise, I don't care.

Is this the Buddhist state of nirvana - not caring about anything? No. It's just resignation - an unwillingness to carry on struggling pointlessly.

I started withdrawing myself emotionally from this place some months ago - back when we moved condos, in fact. I lost my regular daily contact with Thais.

Now, I spend my days at my condo, or a the condo pool. I rarely venture anywhere else, as I have seen it all before, and can't be bothered.

Maiyuu provides for my needs, and I love sharing my life with him. But if he wants to destroy our life with these hare-brained financial decisions, he can go ahead.

I believe I am ready to start a new life in the West, if ever I have to walk away. I want to see what westerners have been getting up to, during the nine years I have been away.

I belong over there, not here. If the day comes when I leave, I shall give Maiyu a chunk of the superannuation fund I am saving at work, then just go.

At the moment, I still love him, so am not contemplating leaving. But if it all comes unravelled financially, then I know what I must do.

I-Phone dilemma, telecoms giant impoverishes Thais

I was entering the condo as the boyfriend was going out to pay bills.

'I am also going to ask the telephone company about buying an I-Phone,' he said.

Maiyuu has seen advertisements on television for Apple I-Phone.

Our satellite TV provider, True Move, is offering phone deals to its television subscribers, via its telephone subsidiary, True Mobile.

Parent company True Corporation announced last November that it had reached a deal with Apple to import the 3G I-Phone to Thailand.

I don't like these vertically integrated telecoms companies...they always have some new deal, some new way for you to waste money. Be that as it may, Maiyuu, who is at home most of the day, saw one of these ads, and decided he would like an I-Phone.

I am not keen on the idea, as I can't see the point. Where once he had many friends, now no one calls, and he hardly calls them. So there goes the usefulness of the phone part of the appliance.

'Oh, I can surf the internet,' he says.

Again, I ask, what's the point, when he has his own computer in his room, with internet access.

Who wants a boyfriend with his head buried all day in a cellphone/mini- computer, or whatever it is? This assumes, of course, that the novelty will last, and that he won't get sick of the thing after the first few weeks.

Most importantly is that I would have to pay. From memory, the thing costs about B23,000 and True is offering it on time payment - payments of B900 a month or so for 24 months.

What a colossal waste! I am not sure yet how Maiyuu proposes to pay for the thing. 'I will spend less on grocery items and food,' he told me as he set out this morning.

True is impoverishing hard-working Thais who can't afford satellite TV, but whose red satellite dishes you can nonetheless find scattered on the roofs of many slum houses in Bangkok.

At my last place in Thon Buri, I overlooked a collection of slum houses - little better than tin shacks - built along a railway line. I could count at least 10 True satellite dishes from where my place stood.

My boyfriend is not a hard-working Thai, if you assume that looking after me at home is easy (he would dispute that).

Nonetheless, he is hardly bringing in a wage, so I would have to pay for this dreadful device myself, if Maiyuu goes ahead as threatened and buys the thing.

'You can't want to go overseas with me, then,' I said in an SMS this morning.

'You already have a computer in your room - what a waste of money. If my income should take a dive, who will take responsibility for paying it off? You will have to get a job,' I said.

50 baht blues, sweetened bread, life as single man

One day left before pay day, and we’re down to the last 100 baht. I felt sorry for boyfriend Maiyuu, so gave him half that amount this morning. 'I will buy a can of sweetened condensed milk,’ he said.

I wondered what exotic creation he was whipping up in the kitchen which required condensed milk. Even as our money has run out, we have still been eating well.

Yesterday, Maiyuu made three dishes, including beef curry, which we ate with rice. They kept us going most of the day.

He wasn’t baking at all, it turns out. He poured his sweetened milk on a slice of white bread (yuck), which he took with some chocolate drink.

The fridge still looks full, so we are not going without. But at times like these I recall fondly my early days in Bangkok, when I was still single, and had money to burn.

I rarely ran out of cash before pay day. A single man’s expenses are much less than those of someone who has found a mate, and Bangkok is no exception.

If I was asked to choose I would still opt for ‘married’ life with Maiyuu, even if we do encounter financial problems occasionally.

I am older now, so do not mind spending my days at home pursuing simple pleasures - reading, eating, watching television.

Apart from anything else, they are cheap. But I also get less pleasure from going outdoors than once I did.

‘Why don’t you want to go out and look at boyz?’ I hear you ask. ‘Surely you live in one of the most exciting cities of the world!’

That’s a single guy’s thing. I can’t see the point otherwise, though I could think of many better places in which to go looking for a potential mate.

Cheese-paring mission, braving floods, sparkies take pity

Two days before pay day, we have virtually run out of money. I am down to my last 500 baht, which I am rationing out.

Maiyuu cut his finger while cooking yesterday. Outside, it was raining. We had run out of plasters at home, so he put a condom on his finger as temporary protection, until the rain stopped and he could go out to buy medical supplies.

I am pleased I had a few extra baht handy, or he'd have to go without.

Maiyuu made a tray of brownies. They are now sitting on the kitchen table, along with two cakes he made the day before.

In retrospect, I would rather he had kept aside the money for more important items, like regular meals, as he must have known that money was getting scarce.

I suggested we go to the supermarket, to buy cheese. If all else fails, I can eat cheese sandwiches, I thought, as we have plenty of bread in the fridge.

Maiyuu and I set out in mid-afternoon. The low-lying streets around our place were flooded. We waded through thigh-deep water to reach the main road.

On the way, we passed centipedes and millipedes floating past. 'Watch out for dog poo....that's here too,' warned Maiyuu.

At the supermarket, Maiyuu cashed in a voucher which gave us B80 worth of credit.

I bought Swiss cheese, for B180. The guy serving behind the counter must have thought I was some poor farang on a benefit.

On the way home, we visited a flea market which opens twice a week on a large piece of vacant land next to a dormitory.

Maiyuu bought som tam for B30, and a large bag of garlic cloves for B25; I bought a large bag of tomatoes for just B20, to go with the cheese sandwiches.

Actually, things are not so desperate. We did manage to buy a few other things from the market...I just can't remember what they were.

I was delighted to find the place, even though the ground was covered in mud. 'They set up the market here twice a week,' said Maiyuu.

'We must come here again, especially if the money runs out,' I said.

The problem is not that we have too little money. It is that Maiyuu misjudges how much we have left, or forgets that we need to live on basic foodstuffs, not just baking.

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Maiyuu is talking about creating his own blog, but undecided what to put on it. Pictures of naked guys? His recipes?

More seriously, he is also thinking about selling his cooking and baking on the internet.

Customers who like what he makes could place an order, which we would deliver.

'I would have to come up with unusual recipes: Thais like recipes that are different and eye-catching. They are not interested in what everyone else has,' he said.

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On the way back from the supermarket, we met two guys in a truck, who gave us a lift on the final stretch of winding, narrow roads so we could avoid the floods.

Maiyuu and I were standing at the head of a low-lying section, about to wade back into the thigh-deep floodwaters which we had earlier braved on the way out of our condo.

A truck stopped in the middle of the road next to us.

'Where are you going?' a young guy in the passenger seat asked Maiyuu.

He gave the name of the condo.

'Hop on,' said the guy.

We clambered onto the back of the open-bed truck.

Sitting on the sides up there, we could watch the floodwaters swoosh by. We were also higher than people in ordinary cars...it felt great.

The men stopped just before our condo to let us off.

They are electricians working at a building site 20m away. We thanked them, and walked the rest of the way home.

Blog turns 3, Mario wilts, glam girl Kawadjan

This blog is now 3. Happy birthday, blog!

How much has it changed?

When the blog started on this day three years ago, it contained stories with a gay theme which I originally posted at a Thai webboard.

I grew tired of the trolls on that board, so decided to move the stories to my own blog instead.

Regular posts about Thai film, gay life, and the boyfriend were to come later.

At first, I wrote mainly about my friends of the night, and Thai entertainers.

Boyfriend Maiyuu and I enjoy following Thai entertainers, especially those we fancy might be gay. I thought I would write them up on the blog.

Back then, few English-language sources were available. The internet contained the odd fansite, and one or two web forums.

But the coverage was patchy and irregular, as most contributors were just fans, like us.

If I knew little about a particular star, I would have to ask Maiyuu to fill in the gaps, as the stories I found in the Thai press rarely told me everything I needed to know.

Fast forward to the present. Today, we are spoiled: readers can turn for daily coverage of Thai entertainment news to Lyn’s Lakorns blog, the Man of the Rose blog, and Dirtilaundry blog, to name but a few.

Three years down the track, I am no longer so interested in the antics of Thai stars.

If I write about them at all, it's usually because the story has some gay theme, or because their fame makes them interesting.

I complained yesterday that research for blog posts can take hours, and at the end of that I still can't be sure if readers will like it. Solution? Write stuff that interests me, and hope others will understand!

This blog probably has a mix of readers in their early 20s looking for star gossip, and another group aged 30 and above, interested in stories about Thai gay life.

Most readers who Google the actor Mario Maurer, for example, are probably young themselves.

They might be interested to read about Mario here, but I doubt they want to know about the new sofa I have just bought. That stuff probably sounds too domestic, and - well, old.

If those posts sound like a man in his 40s wrote them, it’s because he did.

I still write about Thai stars occasionally, as they provide a source of new readers to this blog. However, I also enjoy writing about 'old' stuff as well, because I am getting old, and can't help the way I think.

These days I write much more about my boyfriend, and our lives together in Bangkok.

Stories about the homely side of Thai life draw many more reader comments than those about Thai entertainers. They also give the blog a more personal feel, which I like.

I want to keep up that balance, so will continue writing regularly about the boyfriend and life in Thailand, with the odd post about Thai stars thrown in.

However, the best part about blogging for me is feedback from readers. Posts now get an average of eight responses each, which is great.

Please keep them coming. As I have said before (though it took me a while to learn it), a blog is nothing without you.

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My favourite Thai-based blogger over the past 12 months is Kawadjan.

Like mine, his blog is three years old, though he started it before he arrived on these shores.

Kawadjan, who comes from the Philippines, lives and works in Bangkok.

He has a distinctively gay voice as a writer, is funny, and blogs with a sense of excitement about this place.

He also visits out-of-the-way places in Bangkok, and travels in the region. Could you ask for more?

I like the look and feel of his blog: it is a good place to be. He sounds as if he is talking to intimate friends, even though he is also writing for a wider audience.

He posts pictures he has taken, MVs, and reviews books which have taken his fancy. Kawadjan’s blog is distinctively his own, much more than mine has ever been.

In the next 12 months, I would like to make my blog's 'stamp' more personal, like his. I can't promise to travel, as I hardly go anywhere. I will bring you more tales from Maiyuu's busy kitchen instead.