A warm glow

I walked to the canal near my place last night. A group of teenagers was sitting there.

When I saw them I turned around again, as I did not feel like talking. I watched the activity on the nearby basketball court instead.

One young man bounded off the pier after me. He asked me if I lived in the area, how long I had been here, and whether I liked basketball.

He was probably the 'brave' one in his group of friends. Where the others hang back, this one doesn't mind chasing strange farang for small change.

I gave him 20 baht, as a reward for his effort.

He did not know what my response would be, but still he gave it a go. I put his courage down to my new casual look, in a faded yellow T-shirt. Normally I wear floral casual shirts with a collar, which probably look more serious, despite my bright appearance.

Fifteen minutes later, as I returned to my condo, a woman and two young men entered the building with me. We waited for the lift together. One boy, in his late teens, gave me a big smile, and watched me as we waited.

I have not seen them before. I doubt they are part of the same family, as the woman looked too young to be their Mum. Just another unusual extended family living arrangement, which are so common here that they do not fit the description 'unusual' at all. The boy was still smiling at me as he left the lift.

Now, was it just a coincidence, or does my T-shirt make me look more approachable?

A couple of hours later, after watching the Thai soaps, I put on a colourful dress shirt to visit my regular drinking spot.

A Polish visitor I know had asked me out for a drink. I expected to find her there alone, but instead she turned up with European friends, who I did not want to meet. So I sat at the main table with my Thai friends instead.

My performing arts student friends were there. Occasionally the boys would get up to fetch a new drink, leave the table to use the telephone, or visit the toilet. As they passed me, they would rub my shoulders while we exchanged a few words.

A few of my student friends walked behind me, passed one arm across my chest, and just held me. Another patted me on the bottom. These young ones are not hung up about physical contact. It feels nice, so they do it.

One boy appeared on television recently where he won a national competition for the ra-nat (xylophone), a Thai classical instrument.

Bom gets excited when he talks. When I see him, he cannot keep his hands to himself, as he is a touchy person. He rubs my chest, shoulders, anywhere in reach. When our conversation is done, he gives me a wai, and leaves.

Normally I do not wear T-shirts when I venture out of the market. But if I had worn one to my drinking place last night, the reception might have been even warmer.

Still, the day when I don an ordinary T-shirt instead of a smarter collared-shirt to go out socially is unlikely to arrive.

Clothing that casual looks better on my young Thai friends. I do not want to be regarded as a farang kee nok (poor drifter), or even worse, as mean with money, as one young Thai called me the other day.

He was sitting on the pier with his friends when I walked down to take a look at the passing long-taled boats.

I did not talk to the group, but one boy told his friends that he wanted money for a cigarette.

His outspoken friend told him not to bother: 'Farang, kee ngok,' he said, meaning that even if he asked I would be unlikely to give money, because I am too mean. I pretended not to hear.

That day, I was wearing a smart collared shirt. See, there's just no pleasing some people.