Watch out - Mum's coming (4)

Everyone else feels the sharp end of Mum's tongue, so why not me?

I had intended the last post in the series, 'Watch out - here comes Mum' to be the last. But after arguing with the woman herself last night, in full view of half a dozen customers, I feel obliged to carry on the series.

I set off at midnight, thinking the English football was over for the night. I had watched the closing minutes of one big game at work and, foolishly, thought that was it.

However, no sooner had I hopped in a taxi on the way to Mum's shop, than I heard yet another game being broadcast on the radio. Don't ask me who was playing. I don't even want to think about it.

'God, is that another game?' I asked the taxi driver.

Taking this as an indication that I was interested in listening to the broadcast, he helpfully turned it up a notch further.

'We're just 15 minutes in,' he said enthusiastically.

I went to see Isra's boyfriend, farang J. My boyfriend Maiyuu had gone out for the night, and I did not want to spend the night alone.

At Mum's shop, I sat in a huddle with farang J in front of the TV screen. The same game was playing, via satellite TV, which most Thais in the neighbourhood do not have. Twenty or more young Thais had gathered around the TV - at the bar itself, and on the sidewalk in front of the shop - to watch. Some sat at tables, others were perched on their motorbikes.

We sat in a huddle because the sound was turned up ear-splittingly loud. Farang J, unlike most Englishmen, does not like football. Neither do I. Talking was difficult, as the sound of the English crowd cheering their football heroes was filling my ears. Occasionally, I plugged my ear with my finger, so I could listen to what farang J was saying.

More than an hour later - after time ran out on the the game itself, then went into another five minutes of injury time - the agony ended. Most football fans left for home, as the main action of the evening had finally ended.

Two remained, sitting at the bar, down from me and farang J. These were diehard fans - the type who would watch any football game, no matter how obscure.

'I have had Thais watching football here asking me who the teams are, and which part of the world they come from,' I told farang J. 'They don't support the teams, but they still watch it, simply because it's football.'

After the crowds left, a new game started, more obscure than the others - Spain, versus some other low-ranked team. I decided to change channels. I waited a while, while I summoned up the courage. If I changed over to the news, I thought, no one could object. So I did...

now, see part 5