Penniless gay chef

My Thai partner and I went to bed at the same time last night, and today woke at the same time, too.

From the other room, he yawned loudly. He must have known I would be awake.

A few moments later when I walked into his room, I couldn't see him. He wasn't on his bed, and he wasn't in the bathroom.

-
I remembered a trick he would pull years ago...he likes to hide.

Some nights I would come home from work, and find him absent. I would look in my room and his, and check both bathrooms - no Maiyuu.

Then I would open the wardrobe, just to see. I would find him hiding in the bottom of the wardrobe, with a towel over his head.

Maiyuu hasn't hidden himself away to give me a surprise like that in years.

This morning he did it again...after checking the bathroom, I turned around and saw a figure in grey, squeezed between the clothes basket and dining table. It was him!

-
'Caught you!' I said.

'How did you know?' he asked, laughing.

'I remember you used to hide yourself, years ago,' I said.

If Maiyuu has started hiding himself again, then he in a playful and happy mood. I hope it lasts.

-
It's two days to pay day, and we are poor.

The extra money I will earn from doing extra work at the office hasn't yet arrived, and the boyfriend hasn't been to work for at least a week.

Stuck at home all day, he gets bored, so likes to cook.

In the last two days, the Kitchen of Maiyuu has been busy. On the sweet side, he has made a tray of brownies, and a pineapple and cinnamon cake.

On the savoury side, he has made a dish of Vietnamese soft spring rolls (miang kum rolls) - thin strips of flour wrapped around spicy ingredients such as ginger, chili, green onion and coconut; and fried guay teow sen yay topped with chicken wings and a diced tomato, mushroom and onion sauce (see image below).

I worked out how much money we had left to pay day, how much I would need to take to work, and how much I could give him.

But over the last two days we have been home together, he has just kept asking...and asking. Icing sugar here...fresh vegetables from the market there.

As a result, the money has all but run out, and for the first time, I shall have to ask a friend at work to lend me money so we can make it to pay day.

Thai purse gets fatter

I have found some extra work to do at the office, so for the first time since the last oil price rise, our income should improve.

When oil prices went up a couple of months ago, I lost two part-time teaching jobs. Boyfriend Maiyuu, who works just a couple of days a week, also found his services in less demand, as Thais felt the income squeeze.

The extra work I have found should bring in an extra B12,000 a month, which is a big increase - even compared to the days when I had teaching work.

Maiyuu and I have not discussed what we want to do with it, other than to buy a new pair of jogging shoes for me. We might like to take a trip somewhere - get out of Bangkok, which we have not done together for at least a couple of years.

-

'Would you like to go back to Chon Buri?' I asked Maiyuu last night.

'No. It's boring...nothing to see or do,' he said.

'I will take you to the Don Wai floating market in Nakhon Pathom instead,' he said. 'We have been there before.'

We have? I have forgotten.

'We will buy food...walk around...eat in a restaurant.'

At the start of our relationship years ago, we would spend weekends away in Chon Buri.

Maiyuu and I travelled to the coast to visit his home town there a couple of times a year.

We stayed at a hospitality hotel kept by the navy.

One of Maiyuuu's childhood kathoey friends has a father in the navy, and if we we wanted to stay, his friend would arrange a place through her Dad.

Ocassionally Maiyuu invited me out with his friends for the night. More often, his gay and kathoey friends - Chon Buri has so many, they could start their own theme park - would gather at our place for something to eat, then go out dancing without me. I stayed back because I wanted time by myself.

I would take a bath in the place we rented for the night, then look forward to sleeping between cotton sheets. At home I have a duvet, which is not the same.

My fantasies of enjoying another bubble bath and wriggling my toes between the crisp cotton sheets of the navy hotel will have to wait. The Chon Buri phase in our relationship appears to have passed.

Maiyuu's family is over there - his sister and grandmother, with whom he has fallen out of touch, plus uncles, aunts, and their children - but he has no desire to see them. His childhood friends are over there, too, but he does not appear to miss them.

-

The cool season is approaching, to replace the wet one we are now in. The sun goes down faster - by 6pm, it's almost dark in Bangkok - and the air is getting cooler.

The ants who have taken over my place in recent weeks are growing fewer.

They do not like the cold, so take shelter wherever ants go when it gets too cold to roam.

Unkind farang keeps wallet closed

I decided to put the advice of Lyn and other regular readers to the test: stop giving money to Thai beggars! 

The youngsters around my place who ask me for money may actually come from reasonable homes, but they have learnt the begging habit.

I know my willingness to give them money for food only encourages them, but who taught them to put their hand out in the first place - Mum and Dad?

I walked to the canalside pier close to my condo, as I do every day to watch the boats go by. My internet connection at home was down yet again, so I visited earlier than normal.

As I took a seat on the empty pier, a group of four or five youngsters aged under 10 waved and called out to me from across the other side of the canal.

Some were in the water, a few were perched on the base of the bridge which passes over the canal.

They started to swim over to my side.

Why? To ask for money, of course. They have asked me for money on two or three previous occasions. It wasn't much, and I gave them what they wanted. They thought I would happily give again, so over they came.

I was not in a giving mood. Several youngsters gave me a wai by way of greeting. I returned it.

One big guy took a space next to me on the benchseat which runs along the rickety pier. A skinny guy sat on my other side.

'Do you have money for food?' the fat one asked. He was probably the ringleader.

The others stood around and watched.

'Why is it that every time I come here, people ask me for money?' I complained.

Mr Big Guy looked sullenly ahead. It was like talking to a brick wall, as he refused to acknowledge my comments, other than to say 'krub', over and over.

He was waiting for me to get that complaint off my chest, so he could ask me for money once more.

'I didn't bring any money with me today,' I said.

'Krub.'

'Next time,' I said.

'Krub,' he said. Then, turning to his friends: 'He'll give us money next time.'

The skinny one on my left looked relieved. They now had an answer: next time. They could go back to playing.

Mr Big Guy and two or three others gave me another wai. Our business transaction over, they jumped back in the water and swam to the other side.

Kindly farang opens his wallet - again

I picked up my order of food from the market last night and was heading back to my condo when I heard the clump-clump of teenage feet.

Two young men who saw me collect my food order from a covered eating area opposite my condo were in pursuit. I heard them muttering, then realised they were heading towards me.

I stopped. 'You don't recognise us any more?' one young man asked.

He had dyed his hair gold. No, I didn't recognise him in that colour. I am used to black.

Thais get upset if you forget them, even after months pass by. To delete a Thai's phone number from your cellphone memory is a sin, if you do happen to meet again and he grasps the terrible truth.

The young man with gold hair swims in the canal nearby. I had not seen him fully dressed before.

'We haven't eaten...I have been to work, but my pay hasn't come out yet,' he said.

'It was midnight. How can you not have eaten?' I asked. I wanted to get home and eat myself, but felt guilty, holding my plastic bag containing three Thai meals.

He repeated his story.

I pulled out my wallet. This was becoming a habit. The day before, two youngsters aged 10 or 11 asked me for 'snack money'. Feeding children that age is cheap - they wanted only 10 baht each. As they get older, they want more, and feeding them gets more expensive.

'How many need to eat?' I asked.

'Just me and my younger friend,' said Mr Golden Hair, pointing to a young man whose face I did not know.

A wild-looking youth who knew them pulled up on a motorbike as we talked, but was sensible enough not to put out his hand.

I gave Mr Golden Hair B40 baht, which was barely enough for two meals. I hope he forgives me.

I visit the canal every day to watch the boats go by. I have given youngsters swimming there money for food almost every day this week. The cheeky ones ask, while the meeker ones hold back.

I do not want to get a reputation as a kindly, avuncular farang with a deep wallet. Why can't their parents look after them?

The security guard from my condo watched me hand money to Mr Golden Hair and his friend.

He saw me talking to them, and wandered over for a look. No doubt he disapproved - of the young men asking for money, not me. I am just the stupid foreigner who gets exploited.

Going canalside

Talad Phlu pier, above and top

My local pier doubles as the local teen hang-out, at least during the school break.

Usually it is a quiet place, and I can sit there uninterrupted for an hour or more a day, watching the river.

During the school break - we are in the middle of one now - young ones turn up on motorbikes. Sometimes they bring beer, as they did last night. They always have cigarettes.

Yesterday at lunchtime, I found a lesbian girl with her girlfriend sitting on the pier's benchseat. I had seen one of the girls before: a long, lanky thing, she was evidently the manly half of the relationship.

She had put her arm around her girlfriend's shoulders in a vice-like grip. The younger, fem half was wearing her jeans half way down her backside, no doubt waiting for the butch one to pull them up for her.

When she saw me, the older one took her fem mate away to a more private part of the canalside area.

When I turned to look, the butch girl still had her fem girlfriend grasped around the shoulders in a firm embrace.

-

My side of the market has two small piers, one on each side of a recreational area under a bridge, which youngsters use for playing football.

When they are not there, oldies run laps. One woman who comes dressed in Lycra gear throws what looks like a discus against the chain link fence. Yet another local practises his golf swing.

The pier which I visit most often is next to an eatery. It has better seating space.

On the other side of the court, a new pier has been built, after the old one rusted away. It looks far too smart for the local school-age population. They would rather sit on the grotty, dilapidated pier with me.

-

Last night I visited again. The eatery next to me was full of customers. A man in his 30s sat on the pier, fishing. Ten minutes later, I heard the sound of motorbikes pulling up. The local teen population had arrived.

Within five minutes, I was sharing the small pier space with 15 youngsters, of varying ages. The oldest ones have left school, but some as young as 11 also come.

Sometimes we chat. The young ones who have talked to me before like to sit next to me on the benchseat for a minute or so. Maybe they feel safe next to someone they know, or maybe they think I look lonely.

Then they rejoin their friends, chatting and smoking away on the rickety boards of the pier.

I did not want to disturb them. The river looked still under a moon-lit night. Once I had taken in my fill of the night-time canalside scene, I left to rejoin my boyfriend at home.